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5 False Assumptions Many Christians Make about Married Sex

Wisdom Speaking

I love those who love me,
and those who seek me diligently find me.
(Proverbs 8:17 ESV)

We would all agree that we need God’s wisdom to navigate marriage successfully. We started this blog, and wrote our books, because we didn’t always get it right and wanted to help others avoid some of the misunderstanding we experienced. By God’s grace, we learned a few things over the years, 48 and counting, and wanted to share them with those who seek a more biblical marriage.

The good news is that God will give us his wisdom if we want it. Mark Driscoll says, “The ‘want to’ has to come before the ‘how to’.” Do you want to do it God’s way? If so, then below are 5 false assumptions many Christians make about married sex. These false assumptions are explored thoroughly in our book, 40 Day Bible Sex Devotional for Christian Couples.

Five wrong assumptions many of us make.

  1. We say we got married because we were in love, best friends, and wanted to build a life together (and so many other reasons). God says sex is the only reason you need to get married.
  2. We say sex is for procreation first and then pleasure. God says sex is for our self-control, or sanctification, first.
  3. We say sex is primarily for men and secondarily for women. God says sex is for both husband and wife equally.
  4. We say sex is one of many elements that make up a happy marriage. God says sex is the first priority of a happy marriage.
  5. We say we overcome sexual temptation through spiritual warfare: prayer, fasting, anti-porn software, accountability partners, expensive DVD’s, and will power. God says the best way to overcome sexual temptation is frequent and reciprocal married sex.

These are just a few of the wrong assumptions we make about married sex. We look at each of these – and many more – in detail in our book, 40 Day Bible Sex Devotional for Christian Couples.

Are we married sex experts? No, not at all! But God is! And, fortunately, he tells us how to do it in his Word; that is, if we “want to”.

Blessings – René and Gloria

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